Thursday, March 6, 2014

Death of Common Sense

Not sure what the original source of this is, but a friend sent it to me yesterday. I thought it was very funny... and very fitting, considering the state of things around the world. Once again, I am glad I don't watch TV. I couldn't bear to see more than what the internet news feed me, which is all bad anyway. Enjoy!

Once again we mourn the passing of our beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- Self respect
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird doesn't always get the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- And maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, that only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; Common Sense also took a beating when he couldn't defend himself from a burglar in his own home and the burglar sued him for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live.

Common Sense was preceded in death,
- by his parents, Truth and Trust,
- by his sister, Respect
- by his wife, Discretion,
- by his daughter, Responsibility,
- by his son, Reason.
- by his grandmother, Sound Judgment
- and by his grandfather, Future Planning

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
- But I'm Entitled
- I Know My Rights
- I Want It Now
- It Wasn't Me

And his 4 stepsisters;
-Someone Else Is To Blame
- I'm Offended
- Pay me for Doing Nothing
- I'm A Victim

Sadly, not many people attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone...

May he rest in peace.


  1. I remember his family fondly. Nice post

  2. Did you see the girl in NJ suing her parents for support and school tuition after leaving on her own?!


    1. Yes... I started posting about it but got too aggravated to continue! Back home, all she'd need is some good ol' hiney whooping. A few months of no phone, no parties, 9pm curfew or to the streets you go, and she'd straighten out...

  3. My last post indicates a loss of common sense in my own classroom! As a teacher I can relate to most of that death notice. The latest? A 2 or 3 year old child suspended from daycare because she had a cheese sandwich in her pocket.

    1. The cheese sandwich must not have been in the shape of a gun, otherwise it would've been a 2 week suspension.
      But yeah. How sad is that?!